Good Intentions-Nearest Window.

Friday night I was hoping to do the usual overtime but it wasn't offered. This proved crappy for me. You see, Cole had already committed his self to watching his brother and had to sleep out there overnight.

I was already under the weather from womanly issues and then I was left to my own devices. Being alone for me can be a problem.

I didn't eat bad Friday night. I had a nice bath, got more things prepped for Adam's party, and really enjoyed my time alone. Too much. I couldn't sleep. I finally got to sleep around 4:30 and and woke up @ 7am-blurgggg.

I was feeling anxious cause I had so many loose ends to attend to for the party so I got up and started running errands. I got everything I needed, got some Subway and headed home.

I ate my Subway, finished my baking, tidied up a bit, and got the biggest headache I've had in years. I think I had waited too long to eat and with so little sleep it was a deadly combo.

Luckily for me Cole was on his way home and I could grab a nap. I slept longer than I meant too but I so needed it. So long, in fact, that I skipped supper. So at the party I had a few sandwich triangles and way more sweets than I should have. Only a little veggies.

Now I am finding it hard to get re-motivated for the week as I am having major cramps and I am craving sugar. I just finished a peanut butter ball.

I have to use this as a major lesson. I am not a person who can go without sleep or miss meals. This always leads to headaches and I know this. I have to force myself to take the time out for me. I don't want to end up feeling crappy during my only time this year with my family.

Tomorrow I'm going to kill it on the treadmill and today I'm weaning myself off of sugar. It really is amazing how fast you can get hooked again.

Big Fat Lies & Irritations

I got weighed in Today-technically yesterday by the time but who's keeping track? I stayed the same. I can honestly say that. Still 220.6 on the nose.

Its so strange but in the past I have lied about how I did. Not on my blog but to Cole, family and friends. I would weigh in and lose .6 and I'd say I lost 1 pd. I'd gain .6 and I'd say I stayed the same. Either they are all bad with math or they are on to my game.

I can't really explain why I did this but I'm trying to change it. Even now my first instinct is to bump up the number but I nip it in the bud.

I've lied to myself plenty in the past before too. The diet starts Monday, just one cookie, etc and its gotten me nowhere quick.

I'm a person that hardly ever gets irritated but the smallest thing has irritated me for a bit and it was finally resolved today. I'm a bit embarrassed that I even cared but I did. See if it would bother you too - Here's the story :

I have been with Weight Watchers on and off for about a year and I re-membered yet again in August. So they still went by my starting weight. Somewhere along the way someone made a mistake with the starting number 245.6 and put down 245. So every time I would weigh in I would be short this .6 of a pd.

At first, like any normal human being, it didn't bother me. Then I hit my 15pd goal and they registered it as 14.4. And then I hit 20 pds and they registered it as 19.4 and I said something, and they adjusted it wrong to show 19.8-uhhh.

I bit my tongue until I hit 25pds and she registered it at 24.8-I said 245.6-220.6 is 25pds and she said oh well you can still get the award at the meeting I won't tell anyone-like I was getting away with something-but I wasn't I did this. I earned this. I bit my tongue-accepted my award and went home.

Before my meeting yesterday I brought it up, I am relentless, and one of the workers got out a calculator and went over each of my ups and downs to figure out the mistake. I don't care when the mistake was made, who made it, I just want ppl to acknowledge that 245.6-220.6=25pds.

She finally said okay I will go by your weight and we'll figure out the problem later. Don't get me wrong I love all the workers and they were more than nice and I am never rude about it but hello people-whats a girl got to do to get some scale love?

Am I completely alone? Would anyone else even have bothered with something so trivial? Do I get the crickets?

Soooooo Cold~

The weather here is so sick. I always love the idea of winter but when it shows up I'm always reminded that I don't really like it.

One thing I am loving is my Christmas Card Exchange, so much fun. Yesterday I received a nice card with stickers, a letter about the giver with a before/after pic and a little card:

So cute, so creative. I'll have to keep all these things on hand over the holidays for a little motivation when mine slips.

I started watching The Biggest Loser last night but had to go to work. I haven't read any blogs about it yet but I couldn't believe that Rebecca's dyed her hair-I did not like it. Watching that show really shows how sometimes people can go too far with it. Some of the women especially looked under weight and that is just as unflattering in my opinion.

I bought Jen's E-Cookbook from Priorfatgirl and its awesome. I printed it but don't have a colored printer :( oh well-it is so nicely done. Can't wait to make something.

Well I am off to yet again prepare more for Adam's party on Saturday. Cole has been pigging out all week on my treats-I'm getting scared I won't have enough-haha.

Treadmills and nagging~

I was reading a great blog last night What a slurge and she discussed not letting her co-workers know she was dieting.

I have such strong opinions on this topic I decided to discuss it right here. Since I have been dieting for over half my life I have tried every approach known to woman.

The secret diet, telling everyone, telling a few, etc. I haven't really struck a good balance when it comes to this. I seem to always tell a person I always wish I hadn't.

In the present tense it is a co-worker. I had a momentary lapse in judgement a while ago when she told me she struggled with dieting and told her I joined Weight Watchers.

I didn't tell her this for any particular reason I think I felt she needed to know that someone else was in the same boat. Ever since it feels like she is really struggling with dieting and she is constantly telling me about going to the gym, what she eats, etc.

I don't want to seem uncaring or cold hearted, and I certainly don't want anyone to think I judge them for what they eat-I am the last one who could judge believe me, but I also don't want my eating habits brought up on a daily basis. She mentions these things around others and it just makes me uncomfortable.

Not to mention I've lost 25 pds and she says so how much have you lost so far and I'll tell her and she doesn't say yeah I can tell or you look good or anything. If only I could turn back the clock.

In other news-I've given up walking outside. I have trackers but my legs are still too afraid to fall and it took me forever to do my walk yesterday. It really sucks because from mine and Cole's walk on Sunday morning in the snow my legs are still sore so it really makes for a good workout.

I decided to use the treadmill provided in my apartment building. I so depise a treadmill but at least it has a tv in there.

The room is surrounded in mirrors so I can stare at my ass while working out-haha-should help with portion control.

I'm doing a Christmas Gift Card Exchange on the Weight Watcher Website and I've gotten three so far. One had 4 awesome recipes with the points and everything already tallied and in another card I got a string with 1 inch braided and a little saying.

It says : "What does an inch mean? Here are a few lengths of thread-Just one braided inch. It may look quite small but when you find yourself in a pinch consider the inches you've lost (But how gaining them is a cinch!) When the going gets tough look on this thread and know you will get there-inch by inch.

This is so cute and clever-I have mine on my wrist right now and may replace it with a black one-goes with more-haha. I thought it was so neat.

I so love getting mail :)

The Weekend~

This weekend went by in a blur. Working overtime doesn't seem too bad while I'm doing it but it sure doesn't leave for much downtime or rest.

While I was at work on Friday night Cole got a lot of our housework done and decided to try his hand at baking and choose to do Ginger Molasses Cookies. They are really good.

I had plans with my friend Kim for breakfast and a little shopping so I decided to forgo my usual nap after work.

We got a few things done and with my online shopping I think I way ahead of the game. I did some Christmas baking myself since we are having Adam's party next weekend. Still have more to do but here's what I made so far.

Thumbprints, Peanut Butter & Jar Crumble Cookies, and Chocolate Chip Cookies. I'm proud to say that the baked Chocolate Chip Cookies went into the freezer so fast I didn't even get a pic-they are a weakness-not to say I didn't try a couple-lol~

That night Cole and I got an appetizer tray from M&M Meats and enjoyed some Christmas movies with our munchies and had on all the Christmas Decorations. I wish I could do this every single weekend-its the best.

On Sunday morning we headed out for our walk and man it was freezing-lots of snow had fallen during the night.

Here I am in three layers of clothing and my snow trackers on~

This was at 5:30 in the morning and people usually drive by us like were nuts.

Judging from this pic we probably are-this is the point where I'm thinking why did we bring the camera? So cold.
Had to move around to get warm~

Cole managed to warm my heart by making me a heart in the snow :)

During the walk I got so hungry and thirsty.

Cole did too~
This is right before we went to get coffee-so hot-so nice.

Progress pics.

Well I thought I would do some progress pics to help keep me motivated with my weight loss journey. I am pleased with the results so far. The left is me @ 245.6 and the right is me @220.6!

I can't believe I did my before pics in pajamas-sounds like me-haha. So this is what losing 25 pds looks like. Cole said I seem to have better posture so that is awesome~

I so loathe my double chin I cannot even begin to tell you how much-I hope to lose some by my next progress pics :)

25pd award and 10%

Can you say excited? Today I went to my meeting and I lost 2.6pds. I got my 25lbs award and my 10%. You won't be able to wipe this smile off for a week-haha. It feels so good and so deserved, hell I sweat for this loss-no pain-no gain.

My fellow meeting members are so supportive and its going to be hard to change meetings in January, hopefully I'll figure a way to pop in from time to time.

Its so funny but since today I got my 25pd award and 10% all at the same time I was sort of worried that now everyone knows how much I weigh. Isn't that always the way you get something awesome and immediately try to ruin it for yourself.

I don't even care. This is me-I'm owning this, every step of the way. Its crazy that this has seemed like the hardest week for me but having some great bloggers post words of encouragement to me really proved helpful.

When I stepped on the scale and lost 2.6 I immediately felt like the weight came off, my pants felt lighter. Any of you experience that? So funny but so awesome.

I'm going in for overtime tonight so Cole is the house husband for today-packing lunches, making supper and doing the chores so tomorrow we can both enjoy some much needed downtime. We plan on watching some Christmas movies with the tree and lights on. So nice.

Have a great weekend-blogs are scarce on the weekend but I'll be looking forward to reading some :)