Feeling awful~

Tomorrow I have to get seriously motivated to focus on my goals. The last couple of weeks with all the fighting with my in-laws has seriously taken a token on me.


I think all the stress is actually manifesting into itself and affecting my health. Cole & I still haven't spoken to his parents-The reason is in this post they got back from their trip on Friday. The whole week on facebook she kept posting about how beautiful the place was, etc.


It really hurt us that she was mentioning the place seeing how this was the whole reason for the fight. When Cole said why we didn't want them to go there they said they wouldn't mention it or show us any pictures. Then yesterday she posted like 200 pics of the place-including a pic of her and the hubby under the wedding gazebo-I seriously think there may be something wrong with the woman.

Cole was sleeping while she was posting them and I kept feeling worse and worse looking at them on facebook-for some sick reason I couldn't stop. By the time Cole got up I had the worst pains in my stomach. He is so worried that this is affecting me and my weight loss. He says with all my efforts it would kill him that stress kept me from getting where I want to be.

Cole deleted his mother from facebook. I don't know how I feel about it cause I know that I would do the same thing if mom did this to me. I said I would delete her too for a sign of solidarity but he wanted me to keep her on mine so she would know that he is making the statement-he is the one who is mad and I'm not just getting him to go along with it. They are the kind of people who really love you til they hate you.

I woke up for work this morning and my stomach felt really bad, like really bad gas and it was going around to my bad and everything. I called in sick and tried to sleep but I couldn't. When Cole got back he was really nervous cause I was wearing a bunch of layers and was under blankets but I was shivering. We thought maybe it might have something to do with the gallbladder. I said if I didn't feel better later I would let him take me to the hosp. He ran me a hot bath to get rid of my chill and he even warmed my blanket in the dryer-sweet or what?

I finally fell asleep for a couple of hours and feel abit better but the pain is still there in my back-its so strange. I think I'm letting the fight work me up really bad. I'm going to stop looking at her pics and focus on us-I can't really change anything going on with them but I can change me.

Weigh in :(

I went to weigh in last night and was up 1.8 pds. Ughhhh. I knew I ate bad while on vacation. I have a tendency to let myself go for long periods without eating if I'm not on schedule and I know that slows my metabolism to a halt. This is something I have to work on for sure for my next time off.

The good thing is that I've been doing good with the metabolism the last couple of days so next week should be a great weigh in :)

Not much new to report-still pissed at the in-laws~

Well if you read my last post you will know that I spent a lot of my vacation dealing with stress from my in-laws. It hasn't really stopped because my future mother-in-law keeps posting to facebook how nice the resort is and it seems intentional now.

Another stress I dealt with last week on vacation was the dentist. You see I hadn't gone to the dentist in like 11 years. The first few years it was because I didn't have insurance. After that I just kept getting more afraid.

The longer I stayed away the worst my imagination was getting away with me. Anytime I felt a little bit of sensitivity I imagined having to get my entire set of teeth removed. I was so worked up I didn't ever want to find out what exactly was going on.

So a couple of weeks ago I made both Cole & I appointments. The verdict.... I have two cavities. Not so bad. The lesson...... you can sometimes stress way too much about the unknown, its way better to face your fear and move on.

Besides all the stress I've been focused on I wanted to show you my wedding place cards that I made. My wedding colors are apple green and brown: Pretty? I absolutely loved how they came out. I'm so talented-haha. I went for a super long nice walk in the hailstones yesterday-super cold when I got back-jumped right into a hot shower-so nice.

...when you got enemies

Wow-I can't believe how much time I missed blogging-I so need to vent. This was my vacation week and honestly I have never been so stressed. Its a long story so here goes.....

Even before Cole & I got engaged in July we knew we wanted to get married down south. We have several reasons. Our families are from different provinces, we wanted to keep the cost down and we didn't want the worry of entertaining all these people, going to Dominican would solve all those problems because we would be at an all inclusive resort and everyone could entertain themselves.

Anyways Cole's parents went to Mexico last march and were wanting us to get married there we said no cause we wanted to go to a resort that no one at our wedding had ever been too, we wanted everyone to explore it together and have a great time.

A couple of weeks ago we picked the place-it is beautiful and we couldn't wait. We sent the link in an email invitation to 90 people and everyone kept saying how beautiful it was.

Then last week while I was at work Cole called and said his parents called to ask if we would mind if they went to that resort this year. I said yes, of course, I would mind. He told them that he didn't want them to that we wanted everyone to experience it all together next year. Guess what-they booked it anyways. They are there right now.

So the first couple of days of my vacation I spent crying. I've never been so upset. I wrote them a big heartfelt email on Sunday explaining my feelings we didn't get a reply until Thursday and they lied and said they tried to apologize and they listed some things that they have done for us years ago and something about us not visiting them-a bunch of bull to deflect the real issue.

Cole is wholeheartedly upset because he is so embarrassed his own parents would do this to us. We are changing our resort now and our friends and my family keep asking why would they do this to you. The only reason I can even see is that if you go to the same resort two years in a row the second year you go you will be VIP-this is something his mother talks about all the time. You will get free massages, champagne, etc. I'm the bride but she wants to be the most special one there.

Cole's sister is really disappointing us to. The first day I told her what they did she came over and completely agreed with me-she couldn't believe that with us only choosing one resort out of hundreds that they would have to choose ours. Then later we couldn't get a hold of her and when we finally did she said I don't want to get involved. I said sure I understand but then she didn't even call for my birthday or anything. She keeps writing on facebook how she is so happy for them and hoping they are enjoying themselves. I feel sick.

I think we are definitely still in shock about the whole situation. What kind of parents would do this? I let them know in the email too that we told my mother and friends-I hope they get really embarrassed that everyone knows.

My diet hasn't been good this week-But I have walked some. Tomorrow I am back on the wagon. This week has been crappy for a vacation but we did get lots of rest & relaxation in for sure-can't ask for much more than that.

Another 3 down!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wow guys-I lost 3 pds this week-I can't freaking believe it. I know I worked for it but it hardly shows on the scale.

This makes all the walking, counting, etc worth it for sure. I was so extremely happy when I saw I blasted into the 210's like nobodies business.

2 more pds til I reach 30 pds lost. This week will be challenging since we are on vacation but I'm gonna try to keep it in the lines-haha.

We are having Kelly & Rodney over for Turkey dinner on Sat evening and then my birthday is on Monday so those twos days will be rough but I plan on exercising and reading blogs and eating good the rest of the week!

I'm so happy to finally see results~

5k

Maybe I'm nuts but I'm thinking of registering in a 5k for August. I've been reading up a lot about the couch to 5k routine.

I figure it would be super good for my weight loss to train for it and its something Cole and I can do together.

Today I do day 1 of my training which is brisk walk for 5 mins, jog for 1 min, walk for 90 sec, until you reach 20 mins.

You may ask yourself what a 220 pd woman is thinking signing up for a 5k? Well I won't be 220 by then and what a goal to shoot for - it would be so amazing~

Exercise recap~

I did the first day of my week. I'm super excited for this week to be over since we will be on vacation starting this Friday.

This weekend we had Cole's brother Adam spending the night. Adam is disabled-he has Autism, Tourettes, and a list of others-he is 30. We played Wii most of the evening and next morning so that was really fun.

A pic of Adam chowing down on baby carrots.On Saturday after Adam left we took a small nap and headed out to our friends Kelly & Rodney's house for supper. It was so good - They made Spaghetti pie, garlic bread, salad and cake. Yum~ We were going to play games and Wii but once we get around chatting the time passes so fast.

I got in a walk on Sat morning and Cole & I went for a walk together on Sun morning-the weather here is so nice right now -its unbelievable.

We emailed out early invites to our friends and family for the wedding just to let people save up money if they wanted to go-its in the Dominican. I'm getting really annoyed with family who want us to marry here or my hometown. I'm about ready to let everyone know once and for all that this is our day and we are doing what we want.

I was so excited to get a package in the mail. I had one a contest over at one of my favorite blogs. Cincimom11

My package included all this :

A digital skipping ropeA super awesome mugTwo huge cans of soup. I love winning stuff :)

Today during work two friends and I walked on our two 15 min breaks around the building, I walked home, went for an hour long walk and did 15 mins on the exercise ball.

I made up a schedule where just about everyday I will walk for at least 30 min and one day I will do 15 min on the ball and the next will be 15 min on arms.

I made a commitment to myself to also take better care of my skin. I've started exfoliating twice a week and applying lotion after my showers. Is there anything like this that you plan on committing too?

Down 2.8pds~

I lost 2.8 pds-I'm so excited-maybe the wedding preparations are getting me extra motivated. I felt like I've needed to lose to get motivated and I did-yeah me.

Yesterday I spoke with one of my best friends who is going to stand for me-I got so motivated talking to her about losing weight and looking good in my wedding dress. Over the weekend I plan to write up a exercise plan on my calendar-examples being 30 min walks with arm exercises, 30 mins walk with abs, etc.

I figure that this way I'll be able to do it no problem and I'll feel accomplished when I'm done, and I can always do more if I feel like it.

Woo Hoo~

Post weekend wrapup~

This weekend was a really low key one for us-on purpose. Friday after work Cole picked me up cause it was stormy. I went to the store to pick up some reading materials. I got both Women's Health and the Bridal edition of Shape magazine. I so love reading, magazines are my guilty pleasure. We came home and slept. Cole works nights and I needed a nap anyways. We woke up late in the evening and I made us some breakfast for supper. We had bacon and for me I made Chocolate Chip pancakes and for Cole I made blueberry. They were the best pancakes I ever made-they were from scratch. So yummy.

On Saturday we spent the morning picking out a resort for our wedding next March. I cannot wait - it is so beautiful. We ran down and spoke to a travel agent briefly and picked up some travel books.

I made Cole two loaves of Cinnamon Raisin Swirl bread:

Cole's parents came to visit so one loaf quickly disappeared :) On Sunday I watched the Canada vs USA Hockey game. If that doesn't get the heart beating nothing will.

Looking at the resorts online really got me motivated to work out too. I just got off the treadmill a little bit ago. The scale says I'm down 1 pd but I guess I will have to wait and see on Thursday. Have to get Cole to put some air in my exercise ball so I can do some ab exercises tomorrow after the treadmill.

Here's a pick of my cat checking out my elephant statue:

Isn't she cute?