Yesterday I was feeling so blue I contemplated giving it all up. The dieting, the blogging, everything. When I am sick I can get pretty pessimistic. Of course I'm pretty much the opposite when healthy but what can you do.
I think it all started when I weighed in on Friday. Though I never really spoke my true goal out loud before I kinda had it in my mind that if I lost 1.6pds per week I could make it to my goal in a year. My brain knows this might not happen and that I shouldn't give up if it doesn't but try telling that to my heart.
I have spoken before about my having a defeatist attitude if things don't go perfectly as planned and how I'm trying to shake that. I liken myself to an clock and every so often the power goes out and you need to reset your clock.
Then I started feeling under the weather and thought "Why am I working so hard for something that won't happen?" I don't know why I get like this and sometimes I wonder if I'll ever truly be cured from this negativeness every so often.
The only real thing I know is that I just got back from my morning walk and I'm not giving up. Not yet, and hopefully not ever.
The last thing I want to do is start over with even more weight on in a couple of months, and from my track record that is exactly what would happen. Even if I don't lose 1.6 per week and if in a years time I'm only down 5, 10 , 15 pds at least it will be down.