Monday, January 25, 2010


I was reading some blogs yesterday and something Katie said on her blog really hit home. She said she had a house guest but needed them to give her an hour in the evenings so she could workout but she felt anxiety over it (sorta making a big deal out of a situation).

It really struck a cord with me cause I feel I do this too. I didn't in the past and I wonder if its me trying to go unnoticed in my bigger body.

A huge example of this was just a few weeks ago when I started my new shift at work. We work on computers all the time and have many different programs with many different passwords. I had forgotten a password for one and it wouldn't let me change it for some reason. Everyone else was logged in a working but its really not a big deal if your not. My face was about as red as a tomato having to ask someone to help me.

I wasn't like this before and its a characteristic that I hate about myself now. Why be embarrassed of something like this? Nobody was even looking at me. I don't really understand why I'm like this at times but I'm looking to change it. Hopefully as I lose a bit more weight it won't be an issue anymore.

1 comment:

  1. Big hugs!! That body confidence is hard to achieve. It takes our body image a while to catch up with reality. Once you lose a ton of weight, you'll still feel fat in your head. I now know that if you gain a ton of weight, you still feel thin in your head. It's a funny thing, and it takes a while for those things to match up. You know you're kicking butt, and you should be proud!